On Good Friday, as I was preparing breakfast, Kit asked, “Are we having those Angry Hot Buns, like we had last year?”
“They’re called Hot Cross Buns!” I laughed.
“Angry Hot Buns sounds like someone who is annoyed about getting sunburned in the nether-regions. And yes, we are.”
“Can you even get sunburned in the nether-regions?” he asked. “I thought it was so cold that it sometimes snows there.”
It has certainly never snowed on my nether-regions! I mean, what kind of idiot?!
…..The penny dropped as I realized that he was thinking of the Netherlands! So I explained to him that he had better remember the difference because Dutch people might not appreciate you comparing your bottom to their country!
Somewhat subdued, he asked if he could borrow my laptop to write it out ten times, so he would remember not to offend Dutch people. “Sure. Go ahead,” I said, and forgot all about it for two days.
Yesterday morning (Easter Sunday), I flipped my laptop open to discover that Kit had carefully written out the following ten times (bless him):
Rimemba not to iffend duch peepil.
I was pretty sure that, for all his good intentions, it hadn’t helped. So I quizzed him, “Kit, what is the name of the country we were talking about the other day?”
He pondered briefly, and proudly announced, “The Nether-regions!”
Sorry, Dutch readers! I promise he will have geography lessons when he is old enough.
Then he asked to borrow the laptop again to type out his first message to you all. And this is what it said:
ngwuert-uu1’jiWF GEMOEROIlo,ioyelgh nhfmon
He said you would understand…
I’m not so sure.
When I asked him what it said, he got all uppity, and said that the whole point of writing is so that you can read it, and can’t I read?
So, apparently if you can’t read that, you must be illiterate. Let’s just imagine it says:
A Very Happy Easter to you and yours with love from Meerkat Kit.
I think he would like that.